


The United States Of Luke

by xRCHLMUSTDIEx



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Ashton Irwin - Freeform, Calum Hood - Freeform, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Luke Hemmings - Freeform, M/M, Michael Clifford - Freeform, Muke - Freeform, Multiple Personalities, Relationship(s)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-10
Updated: 2015-08-30
Packaged: 2018-03-16 06:11:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,417
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3477425
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xRCHLMUSTDIEx/pseuds/xRCHLMUSTDIEx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Luke has gone out"<br/>"Luke your right here in front of me"<br/>"I'm not Luke. Like I said, he's gone out."</p><p>or</p><p>Lukes' DID (dissociative identity disorder) or MPD (multiple personality disorder) ,which ever suites you best, returns right before going on tour with his band 5 Seconds of Summer.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. O N E

Has your mind ever just drifted away to the point where it's like your not even there anymore.

Has it?

It probly has. My mind does it all the god damn time.

It started with their names. Never stick to just one. I'd be Luke one minute then the next I'd be Logan. I couldn't control it, it just happened.

I felt a connection to that name, a bad connection. Not like the connection wasn't strong, but the connection I felt, I hated it. It brought terrible memories.

Later came Jude. I've always liked Jude. I feel happy when I'm Jude.

And then Luka came. I felt like a child when I was Luka. I'd want to run around and play on a swing.

Their names dragged on. I didn't tell anyone. Not my friends/band mates, not my siblings. My parents didn't know. I'd just lock away in my room until I was Luke again.

Later came their personalities. It all happened so quick I almost missed it.

I was at practice and Michael and I were talking about the cords that I could seem to get.

 

"Luke, it's not that hard." He said demonstrating the cords for the fifth time.

"Now you try." Ashton and Calum had gone out to get drinks but that was a while ago so they should be back soon.

"Luke? Luke! Snap out of it, god, it was like time ran away without you"

It was now the tenth time Michael was showing me the cords,now. I couldn't grab them. I was trying to control myself. I knew they came out when I was stressed or unstable. I didn't want him to think I'm a freak.

"I think we should just drop the song."

Michael stared at me in disbelief.

"You fucking kidding right. We're not going to drop the song just because of some cords Luke." I was beyond stressed over the fact that I couldn't get the few cords down.

And that's when it happened. That's when Luka came out to play. It was like I fell asleep but I could see and hear everything around me. I closed my eyes and took a breath. I was done and Luka was out. But it wasn't just a name.

 

Shit wen't down that day.

I hadn't transitioned for a while, but when their names came up, I got scared and didn't know what to do. I bottled them up. I didn't want to tell my mum, I didn't want to worry her.

Once my friends knew and I was certain that they'd leave me, but they didn't.

So now here I am at the airport with my three best mates waiting to board a plane that will take us to Arizona, where we start our tour.

"Luke are you okay?" Michael turned to me. He's been the most supportive out of everyone.

"I'm fine Michael." I assure him.

"You zoned out, I thought you-"

"Michael I'm fine, I promise."

He put his hands up in defense. A security guard came in a little after and led us out if the small room and into where we had to go in for checking and all that. We passed our fans and we took pictures and signed things till we were rudely pushed away by security.

The fans didn't know about my disorder, I wasn't ready to tell them.

As we were walking I saw a guy arguing with a guard. He when back to what I suppose was his girlfriend and asked him why there was so much commotion.

"Just some faggots of a band." he scoffed loud enough for everyone to hear.

Some girls started banging up on him. It made me happy that they look after us, but his words hurt.

I came out not long after my alters surfaced. No one had a problem and that made me thankful beyond anything.

Micheal noticed and came up to me.

"Luke don't listen to him."

I gulped. "I know"

Once we were on board, we had a while before the plane took off so I got out my phone and got onto twitter. Opening it, I got bombarded with hate.

'Who dose Luke Hemmings think he is.'

'Someone should tell Luke Hemmings that he need to lose weight.'

'Luke Hemmings or a despicable faggot'

I didn't notice that I was crying until a tear fell on my phone.

They're right

They're all right.

"Luke? Luke are you okay?" Calum noticed my tears.

"No." Was all I said.

There was a war in my head, all these thoughts were banging all over. And I couldn't take it.

I closed my eyes and took a breath.

"Luke?" Calum asked cautiously. All of their attention was on me.

"Oh my, I hardly come out to play anymore it's all just that little child."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A.N 

i messed up the order of the chapters, also, I AM BACK HELLO


	2. T W O

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> what happened when Luke became Luka in front of Michael and what happened from that day on and how they've learned to cope with it. Also to make things easier, when you see this --> >

 

"Luke it's no-", Michael said before he was cut off

"I know a boy named Luke, he's sad a lot" Luka said in a somewhat high pitched kiddie voice.

"Luke are you okay?" Michael was kinda concerned about Luke.

"My name's not Luke silly," Luka taped Micheal's nose and giggled, "my name is Luka ."

Michael didn't know what to do.

"Luke stop fucking around we have to get this down."

Luka gasped. "You said a bad word mister." He had frown on his face but the way little kids do.

"Is this some kinda fetish Luke?"

"Mister is Luke your boyfriend or something?"

"No Luke your not my boyfriend." Michael was now very confused to why one of his best mates was acting like a five year old child.

"Okay two things then. One, My names not Luke it's Luka, and two, then why do you keep asking for Luke."

Michael was just about ready to jump off a fucking Cliff.

"I keep asking because I want to know why he's acting like a goddamn five year old!"

"Mister please keep your voice down, I don't like when people yell." Luka pouted.

"Okay fine. Where is Luke and when is he coming back."

Luka was now sitting in a chair and wiggling around in it blowing raspberries.

"Luke's gone out. I think he's sleeping. Can I have candy."

"When is Luke coming back?"

"I don't know." Michael set his guitar down and walked over to the boy.

"Where is Luke." Micheal was now firm with his tone.

"I don-"

"Bullshit!" Michael yelled kicking the chair.

"Mister I don't know why your upset but please stop yelling, your scaring me."

"I'm sorry Luke." Michael said softly.

It was now Luka's turn to yell.

"No! My name's not Luke it's Luka!" Luke is sad, I'm not! I'm not Luke!"

"Okay okay I'm sorry, Luka " Micheal was hesitant but decided to play along until Ashton and Calum came back.

"What's that?" Luka said pointing to Michael's guitar.

"It's a guitar." Michael said plainly.

"Can I play with it?"

"No you can not."

"Please?"

"No." Michael said strictly, not particularly trusting Luke at the moment.

"Please?" Luka dragged on.

"No." Michael stood his ground.

"Okay." was all he said before walking over to Michael and grabbing the guitar behind him and started running around.

"Luka give that back!" Michael ran after him.

Luka was laughing while running around the small area. "Catch me if you can!"

"Luka this is'nt funny!"

"Yes it is!" Luka ran around the practice area.

It wasn't until Ashton and Calum came in that made Luka drop Micheal's guitar. In which case Micheal running over to his guitar and holding it for dear life.

"Hi my names Luka, I like to play, do you want to play with me," Ashton and Calum just stared at Luka. Luka saw Calum and his face lit up. "Caly, oh my gosh I'm so happy your here! We can play superheroes now!"

"Um Ashton, Calum can I talk to you for a second outside. Luka ,here, play with this." Micheal handed Luka some stringies they keep around.

Luka gasped."Wow that's so cool!" while Luka was distracted, Michael took Ashton and Calum into a small room with a window so they could see Luka.

"Whats wrong with Luke?" Ashton was the first to open his mouth.

"I don't know but he's acting like a five year old and says his names Luka."

"Luka?" Calum stepped in.

"Yeah." Michael looked over to the window and saw Luka playing with the toy he gave him.

"That was his nickname when we were kids. His mum and I always called him Luka. He called me Caly."

"I think we're missing the big question, Why is Luke acting like this?" Ash pushed.

"I don't know Ash."

"I do." Calum spoke.

"What?" Ashton asked.

"I said I do. I know whats happening."

"Well what is it."

Calum simply walked back into the room.

They returned into the room and Luka ran up to them.

"Can we play now?"

"Luke wher-" Ash asked but was cut off.

"My names not Luke! It's Luka!" he stomped.

"Okay sorry. Luka, where is Luke?"

"I don't know I just know he's gone out."

"Okay then, Luka why don't we play superheroes," lukas face lit up, "just like how you and Caly used to."

"Caly did you hear that?!"

"I herd Luka." Calum knew what was happening.

They played for what seemed like forever. Until Luka stopped. He closed his eyes and took a breath.

>

"Oh no, Luke needs to rest. I'm Jude. Has Luke been crying?"

Micheal nods.

"That explains why my face is wet." He said wiping Luke's tears.

"Oh excuse my rudeness, I believe we haven't met. Like I said, my names Jude, are you friends of Luke's?" Jude spoke, his voice likes Luke's, but his was calm with a lot more confidence in it.

Micheal simply stood up and made his way to the kitchen. He peeked his head in and saw Liz and Calum talking.

"Sorry to interrupt but, there's someone named Jude in the living room."

Calum and Liz rushed out into the living room to see that ,indeed, Jude was there.

Judes eyes saw Liz and Calum and he stood up with joy.

"Oh Liz, so nice to see you again! And Calum!" He gave them hugs,"How's the turtle?"

Calum was confused,"Jude I never had a turtle."

"Wonderful!" Jude exclaimed giving Calum a pat on his cheek.

"Um Liz, has Luke gotten rid of our clothes?"

"No ,dear, they're in a box in his closet."

"Oh thank god, I don't know how he can walk in these jeans." He made a disgusted face before running up the stairs.

Silence fell and Ashton was the first to speak.

"Okay can someone please tell us why Luke is acting like this?"

"Okay," Liz said sitting down, as well has Calum, "Luke has DID or MPD ,which ever one you want to call it, It stands for dissociative identity disorder or multiple personality disorder. It basically means Luke has these alters that help him cope with trauma. As far as we know Luke as three, Luka, Jude, and Logan, all male but he can have female alters. Luka is four, Jude is eighteen, and we don't know Logan's age." Liz explained to the young boys.

"What about Logan?" Jude asked walking down the stairs with a dark teal shirt, brown pants, and a khaki cardigan.

"Oh nothing, I was just explaining the the boys about Luke and you guys." Liz spoke casually.

"No surprise he hasn't told them anything. I'm sorry I still haven't gotten your names." He turned to Micheal and Ashton.

"I'm Micheal."

"And I'm Ashton."

"Well nice to meet you Micheal, Ashton." Jude said, shaking their hands.

"Jude why don't you sit down and explained to them a little more about Luke, yourself and the other alters." Calum suggested.

"Oh of course." He said taking a seat.

"Okay so, Luke has alters like myself and Luka, which came out earlier, to help him with trauma. Luka is Luke's younger self, Luke had a bad childhood so he's literally putting his child self here so his child self doesn't suffer in an attempt to escape the suffering he had as a child. He also has the habit of bottling up his emotions so that's another reason he has DID. I ,myself, am a totally different story. I'm what you'd call an organizer, I keep the alters in Luke's head in line, I also make sure Luke is getting what he needs. Like if Luke decides to stop eating, I come out and eat for him."

"Okay wait, wait," Ashton cuts Jude off, "What did trauma did Luke get from his childhood?"

"Liz can I answer this one?" Calum asks.

"Go ahead." She gives him the green light.

"Luke's dad was an alcoholic and would hit Luke, his mum, and his brothers whenever he was drunk. Liz would call Luke Luka and so would Calum, It was like his second name. When Luke was seven, his dad left them."

"Wait but Luke's dad is here all the time." Micheal questioned.

"Yeah, he makes good toast." Ashton added.

"That's Luke's stepfather." Liz answered.

"Luke has a step-dad?" Ashton exclaimed.

"He never told us that."

"Luke never tells you guys anything," Calum shouted, "he's a sealed shut book." He finished, mumbling the past part of his sentence.

"Okay so then we've seen Luka, your Jude, who is Logan?"

"We don't know Logan's' age but we're guessing he's about 14, maybe 13. He doesn't talk, he's not mute, just doesn't want to talk. We think he's here because Luke was raped in year eight. There was this girl that really liked Luke and would always ask him out, but Luke would always say no. One day she just kinda snapped and dragged Luke into a supply closet and raped him." Jude explained.

"Why don't we know any of this? Does Luke not trust us?" Micheal pulled at his hair in frustration.

Jude gasped, "Oh no no no, Luke would trust you guys with his life, it's just that Luke's afraid that id if he tells you, you guys would leave him. Trust me I know." Jude reassured.

The rest of the night consisted talk of the alters. Jude made it clear that each alter is different in style of clothing, music, food, and so on.

Jude stayed the night and even cleaned Lukes room for him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Luke woke up feeling a lot better but he was still worried about what happened.

He noticed that his room was clean.

"Goddamn it Jude." He mumbled.

Making his way don stairs, he noticed how quite it was. He walked into the dinning room to see his mum sipping away at her coffee.

"Did Jude pay a visit last night?" He asked.

"Yeah he did. He helped explain to Ashton and Micheal about you."

He sighed,"What'd they say?' He asked looking down at his feet.

"Nothing, they just wanted to know how they could help."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

After numerous appointments with Luke's psychologist, Doctor Moon, the guys almost fully understood Luke's D.I.D .

Calum had dug out an old notebook in which he used to keep track of alters and their personality to which they all reviewed and probably knew by heart.

By the end of the month they had known exactly how to deal with Luke's DID and not only did it open eyes, it also brought the guys a lot closer.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A.N

Okay next chapter is going to be back to present day.

~Rachael


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the alters smell fishy and it's not because of fish.

"Guys I think this is going to be a sick tour." Micheal says as he sits down on the couch in the tour bus. The just finished their last show at The Forum.

"Yeah too bad we have to have long-ass break before we start again." Calum added.

"Yeah who's idea was that?" Ashton asks.

Luke shrugs his shoulders and falls next to Micheal. Luke and Micheal have gotten really close ever since the alters came out. Everyone got alot closer and Luke was opening up the the guys, but even being open, the alters would never leave.

"Who ate my slice of pizza?" Ashton yelled.

"Oh I gave it Luka so he would shut up." Calum said walking over to his bag and taking out the ,what they call, 'book-o-luke', "Also Luke, Luka said something interesting?"

"What did he say?" Luke leaned forward.

"Okay so it was like a couple hours till the show and I was telling Luka that we needed you. So he said if we gave him pizza he would get you. I asked him if that was even possible and he said that he can." Calum said opening the notebook.

"Do you think they could actually bring you back? I mean didn't Lucy bring him back after she got bored." Ashton asked.

"I don't know."

"Luke we need to talk to Jude." Micheal stated.

"But-" Luke was about to argue but was cut off by Ashton

"Luke you can play guitar for shit." He insulted. Micheal and Calum understood what he was doing.

"what?" Luke whispered.

"Luke you song writing skills suck." Micheal said.

"Yeah. Also I think you should stop eating, your gaining."

The three started bombing Luke with insults and Luke was in no time in a ball crying.

He closed his eyes and took a breath.

 

"Are you guys trying to make it worse for him!? God, he already has enough going on for him." It was Jude.

"Jude we needed to talk to you and we didn't know any other way to bring you out." Micheal explained.

"What is so important the you needed to bring Luke pain." Jude was obviously upset.

"Luka said that you guys could bring back Luke when he's 'gone out'."

Jude face turned into a face of worry.

He cleared his throat, "That little child doesn't know about what he's talking about. We can't do that."

"Jude we know your lying." Ashton steeped froward.

"N-no I'm not i-i swear." Jude stuttered out.

"Jude can you guys bring Luke back!" Micheal was getting impatient.

Jude closed his eyes and took a breath.

 

"You dicks!", Luke yelled and shoved Micheal, "How dare you take advantage of me like that!"

"Luke how do you know what we did?"

"Because I'm crying, my phone is in my pocket, and you guys are the only ones on the bus!"

"Luke we needed to know what Luka meant." Calum tried defending them.

Luke just grunted and talked in to the back of the bus.

"I'll go talk to him." Michael stood up and made the small trip to the back of the bus.

"Hey Luke?" He said through the door.

"Go away!" Luke yelled.

"Luke we're sorry," Micheal sighed, "I'm sorry." He whispered.

There was a click and the door was creaked open. Micheal walked in and saw Luke sat on the couch looking down at his feet.

"Oh wait," Micheal rushed out of the room to the mini-fridge, "Here." He said handing Luke a beer.

"Thanks Mikey." Luke said opening it and taking a sip.

"Luke I'm sorry about what we did, we were being stupid."

"It's fine," Luke said as she sat down and open his arms,"but I won't accept your apology unless you come cuddle."

Michael thoughtlessly walked over to Luke.

"Ya know I was kinda glad you guys made Jude come out." Luke admitted.

"And why is that?"

"Because then I wouldn't be cuddling with you right now." Luke giggles as well as Michael.

Micheal pulls his phone out of his pocket and scrolls down twitter.

The two slowly fell asleep into each others arms.

It was about 30 minutes into their sleep when Luke's beer bottle dropped and shattered onto the floor; waking the two up.

"oops." Was all Luke said before pulling Micheal back. Calum and Ashton came bursting in with a colander.

"What happened." Calum said holding out the colander.

"Nothing, Luke just dropped his beer bottle and it broke." Micheal explained.

"Oh, you guys scared me I thought a fan broke in." Calum put down the colander and followed Ashton out.

"And what were you going to do with a fucking colander. Why the fuck is there a colander on this bus?" Michael mumbled tiredly.

The rest of the night consisted of nothing but a peacfull sleep for all four of the guys.


End file.
